


Peaches and Pick-up Lines

by MagicGirlinAMuggleWorld



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grocery Store, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Awkward Flirting, Baby Harry, F/M, Flirting, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, James and Lily are adorable dorks, Romance, dad jokes, farmers market, jily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-30 16:06:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17831774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicGirlinAMuggleWorld/pseuds/MagicGirlinAMuggleWorld
Summary: Muggle AU; Single-dad James briefly loses his son Harry in a farmer's market, but when Lily finds him, the chemistry between the adults is undeniable -- even if it takes a little help from their friends to figure it out.





	Peaches and Pick-up Lines

**Peaches and Pick-up Lines, a.k.a.**

**Beautiful & Terrifying**

The morning began like many other summer Saturday mornings, with Lily and Remus meeting at their favorite coffee shop at eight before heading to the farmer’s market for fresh veggies and people watching. This particular Saturday, Remus was complaining to Lily about the size of the strawberries in one particular stall (“You can’t tell me these aren’t genetically modified, look at them!”) when he felt a gentle tug on his trousers, near his knee. He looked down and found a tiny toddler with thick black hair gripping the denim leg of his jeans in one hand and pointing at a display of peaches with the other.

"My apples, Papa?" he asked hopefully. "Mine?"

"Those are peaches," Remus corrected gently, reflexively, just before he panicked.

"Fucking hell!" He hopped backwards, breaking the child's grip on his jeans. "Lily!"

\--

"Sirius, where's Harry?"

James asked the question with the kind of practiced calm he often used when seeking information from his six- and seven-year-old students. It was a gentle voice, one that inspired confidence and encouraged honesty instead of whining and fibs and finger-pointing. Only one who knew him very well would be able to tell James was about four seconds away from screaming bloody murder.

Sirius knew James very well. "You were holding him last," he said, his tone accusatory only because he, too, was on the verge of panic. "You had him on your shoulders, and then you put him down to hide from Marlene—"

"I wasn't hiding, I had to tie my shoe!"

He _had_ been hiding, but that was irrelevant. Marlene was well-meaning, but she'd been trying to play matchmaker ever since Harry’s mother had up and moved to New York to chase her Broadway dreams, James and Harry be damned. That was six months ago, and, honestly, James didn't want to be matched with anyone right now. He just wanted to teach his primary schoolers and play football on weekends and let his parents and Sirius spoil his precious son absolutely rotten.

His son. His son who was missing.

James’ attention snapped back to the present. And that’s when the screaming began. "HARRY!"

\--

Lily turned away from the strawberries she'd been considering at the same moment the child looked up and realized that Remus was not, in fact, his papa. The little one's green eyes went wide and he stumbled backwards, lower lip quivering.

"Oh!" Lily was squatting at his side immediately, holding out a cautious hand to steady him. "It's all right, love, it's all right. Now, who do you belong to?"

The child began shaking his head violently. “Ohhh, nononono,” he said over and over, spinning in a clumsy circle as his eyes scanned nearby faces for his father. Not finding him, he settled for backing away from Lily, still shaking his head. Lily reached for him, but he wrenched his chubby arm away and cried out, “Papa!”

“Lil, maybe we should let him go,” Remus said nervously. “It looks like you’re trying to kidnap him.”

“Remus, why would you say that?” Lily hissed. She glanced around to see if anyone looked prepared to call the police. “We can’t just let him go, we can’t leave a two-year-old alone in the farmer’s market! Someone must be looking for him. We should keep him here until they come back.”

The tot let out an ear-splitting wail, and Lily winced and gave Remus a pointed look. “If nothing else, I’m sure _that_ got their attention.”

\--

James and Sirius froze, each honing in on Harry’s cries with animal-like precision, then took off running in the direction of the sound. Thankfully, they found him almost immediately, his tiny fists pressed to his eyes and his mouth wide open in a scream, standing just on the other side of the stall of fresh fruit they’d been browsing when Marlene approached. A red-haired woman in a sundress and cowboy boots was squatting next to him, gamely trying to look in control, and a lanky man with brown hair stood behind her, gamely trying to look uninvolved.

James barely noticed either of them. He skidded to a stop in front of the strangers and snatched up his crying child, relief flooding through his body with such force that he began shaking.

"Oh, Harry," he mumbled, covering his son’s splotchy red face with kisses. "I'm so sorry, my love. I'm here now. Papa’s here."

With a sob, Harry threw his arms around James’ neck and buried his little face against his father’s shoulder. James continued to coo softly at him, rocking him back and forth and kissing his curly hair.

He was fine. Harry was fine. James squeezed him more tightly and tried to stop his own trembling.

Sirius seemed wobbly, too. “You gave us a scare there, buddy,” he said, sighing as he reached out to gently rub Harry’s back. Harry looked up at him with watery eyes and gave a loud sniff.

The red-haired woman cleared her throat. “I’m sorry,” she said, folding her hands under her chin and tucking her elbows into her body as though she were embarrassed. “I knew someone would be looking for him, so I just tried to make sure he didn’t leave before you came back. I hope he’s all right, I didn’t mean to scare him.”

"No, _thank you_ ," James said, drawing in a shaky breath. "I’m just so grateful. And I’m sure he is, too, even if he’s got a funny way of showing it. Right, Harry?” He kissed his son’s head again, then finally looked up and let his eyes rest on the woman, offering her an awkward smile. "I swear he’s not always such a screamer. But then, I don't usually lose him, so. There’s that."

"Oh, it's all right," the woman said breathily, her eyes shining as she looked up at James. "You're beautiful."

\--

Lily wanted to die.

Only figuratively, of course. And no doubt the man _was_ beautiful – tall, with cinnamon-brown skin and a square jaw covered in dark stubble, muscled forearms on display as he cradled his adorable child. He had wavy black hair with a cowlick in the front and bright hazel eyes behind black-framed glasses. His arms belonged on the cover of a romance novel, and the glasses gave him a hot-professor vibe, and Lily was here for _all of it._

But she hadn’t meant to acknowledge it _out loud_.

Her eyes widened, and the man chuckled. His friend – who Lily now noticed was strikingly handsome in his own way, all pale skin and high cheekbones like some lost elf prince from _Lord of the Rings_ – coughed loudly to hide the fact that he was laughing, too. Lily could feel her cheeks heating up, knew her face was nearly as red as her hair, but she tore her gaze away from the man’s face and focused it on the child in his arms.

"I mean, _he's_ beautiful," she amended, giving the baby a smile and a small wave. He covered his eyes with his little hands, and Lily laughed. "Aw, Sweetness,” she cooed. “It’s all right, you’ve got every right to be scared. I'm obviously terrifying."

The handsome young father shifted the tot, Harry, to his left hip and held out his right hand with a laugh. “Hi, Terrifying, I’m James.”

James’ friend groaned and covered his eyes with a graceful hand. “You’d think he’d save the dad jokes for when Harry’s old enough to be embarrassed by them, but no. He makes us all suffer right now.” He shook his head then put two fingers to his brow in a quick salute. “I’m Sirius, by the way.”

Lily giggled and saluted back. “Well, I’m Lily, officially, but you can call me Terrifying if it’s easier.” She took the hand James offered and shook it. “It’s nice to meet you.”

\--

Lily was, in James’ humble opinion, the kind of pretty that inspires love songs. He hadn’t noticed initially, because, well, he’d lost his _child_ , and getting him back in one piece was the only thing on his mind. But now that Harry was secured, and his tears were subsiding, James could allow himself the luxury of inspecting the woman in front of him.

And it was indeed a luxury.

She had thick, dark red hair and almond-shaped green eyes that crinkled at the corners when she laughed. Her skin was pale, with a sprinkling of freckles across the bridge of her nose and many more on her shoulders and down her arms. James had the unexpected urge to trace those freckles with his fingertips.

He let go of her hand and forced himself to stop staring. “All right, mate?” he said, turning to her friend. “I’m James.”

“Remus,” the man with Lily said, shaking James’ and Sirius’ hands in turn. His gaze lingered on Sirius, and James bit back a smile. People tended to look at Sirius with the kind of admiration usually reserved for Michelangelo’s _David_.

“Good to meet you,” Sirius said, nodding at Remus.

“Yes, and thank you both,” James added. “I hope we haven’t derailed your morning too severely.”

“No, not at all,” Lily said quickly. “We haven’t got any schedule, we’re just here for fresh fruit and people watching.”

“This farmer’s market has the best-looking guys,” Remus added, with another unsubtle look at Sirius.

Sirius smirked back. “I’ve noticed that, too. And yet, they keep letting this one in.” He hooked a thumb at James and rolled his eyes affectionately.

Lily and Remus laughed. “It’s probably because of Harry,” Lily said, smiling at James like they shared an inside joke. “I mean, who could deny that face?”

“Er, right,” James said, twisting his neck awkwardly in a failed effort to keep Harry from removing his glasses. “Harry, please—”

“Apples, Papa!” Harry said, waving James’ glasses around. “Apples!”

“Peaches,” Remus muttered.

Harry squirmed and tried to launch himself out of James’ arms in the general direction of the peach stand. “Right, well, I guess I’d better buy my son some fruit.” James chuckled and lowered Harry to the ground, where the little boy began to run in circles around James’ legs. “And then maybe a nap, eh? It’s been a big morning.”

“And I guess we’ll let you get back to your people-watching,” Sirius said. “But maybe we’ll see you around sometime?”

“Yeah, that’d be nice.” Lily said. She flashed another smile at James. “Maybe I can earn Harry’s trust. And a new nickname – upgrade from Terrifying to Mildly Suspicious.”

\--

Once again, Lily wanted to die. An extreme solution to her terrible flirting, to be sure, but she couldn’t think of any other way to be certain no more stupid, stupid words would come out of her mouth. She settled for holding her breath.

Sirius snorted, and Lily could feel Remus cringing next to her, his face probably a mirror to her own embarrassment. She didn’t dare look at him to confirm.

Fortunately – and unfortunately – James barely seemed to be paying her any attention.

“Heh, we’ll see,” he said, distractedly. Harry had dropped the glasses but now held a peach in both hands, and he looked prepared to throw it. “First impressions and all that.” James snatched the fruit from his child and picked his glasses up from the ground.

Sirius cleared his throat. “Mildly Suspicious? You’re giving James a run for his money with the lame jokes, aren’t you?” He barked out a loud laugh and glanced from Lily to James pointedly. “Rare to meet someone else who enjoys your particular brand of humor, Prongs.”

Lily still wished she could melt into the pavement, but she gave Sirius a grateful smile.

Remus, meanwhile, was frowning. “Prongs?” he asked.

“Hmm?” James said, apparently still not paying attention to any of them. Harry was jumping and waving his arms at his father, trying to retrieve the confiscated peach. “Right, good one. I’m sorry, I think I’ve got to deal with this.”

He gave Lily a crooked smile and waved at her with the hand holding the peach, his other hand grabbing Harry’s flailing one. “Nice to meet you both.”

And with that, he turned to the peach vendor and began asking about the price of fruit.

Lily could not remember ever having experienced such a casual-yet-thorough rejection.

“Right, nice to meet you!” she said hastily, grabbing Remus’ arm at the wrist. He blinked and looked as if he were about to say something, but Lily turned and dragged him away.

\--

As soon as Lily and Remus were out of earshot, Sirius grabbed James by the shoulders and spun him so they were face to face.

“Oi! What are you doing? I need to pay for these peaches!”

“What am I doing? What am _I_ doing?” Sirius cried, giving James a good shake. “What are _you_ doing, mate?”

“What do you mean?”

“Lily was doing her damndest to chat you up, and you didn’t even get her number!”

“She wasn’t chatting me up! She was being polite to the idiot father who nearly lost his son in a farmer’s market!”

“You can’t be serious,” Sirius said, looking around as if he hoped someone else would acknowledge James’ idiocy.

“Of course I’m not, _you_ are,” James said, because he couldn’t help it. It was _right there_.

Sirius growled in frustration and spread his hands helplessly. “Really? Is that what we’re doing?”

The man working the peach stand provided Sirius the confirmation he was looking for. “You talkin’ about that red-head bird?” he asked, nodding wisely. “She was chattin’ ‘im up fer sure.”

“Of course she was!” Sirius yelled, exasperated. “Did you not hear her call you beautiful? You, _beautiful_? I mean, you’re fit enough, and you’ve got great hair, obviously, but _I’m_ the beautiful one. And she barely noticed me!”

“What do you care? You don’t even like women!”

“Not a bit, but you do! _And apparently this one thinks you’re beautiful!_ So why, pray tell, did you ignore her?”

James grunted and passed the peach vendor two pounds for three peaches, handing one each to Sirius and Harry and keeping the third for himself. Harry squealed with delight, and James smiled at him for a moment before turning to Sirius with a sigh.

“I didn’t _ignore_ her. But I’ve told you, I’m not interested in dating right now,” he said patiently. “That’s why I was avoiding Marlene, remember?”

“I know you didn’t want to be set up with anyone, but this is different. The very moment when you’re trying to avoid meeting a woman, a perfect one lands right in your lap? It’s a sign! Tell me she’s not exactly your type.”

“I wouldn’t say _exactly_ —” James began, but Sirius cut him off.

“Oh, come off it, you’re a lost cause for freckles. And her jokes are as bad as yours! That has to count for something.”

“I’m a single father, Sirius. Harry is my priority and always will be.” James shrugged. “Not every woman can deal with that, and I don’t have time to sort through the ones who can’t.”

Sirius put his hands on his hips and frowned. “Right, because Lily certainly seemed so put-off by your _beautiful_ child. Enough excuses, Prongs. We’re going to find them.”

\--

After tearing her way some twenty meters across the market, Lily dropped Remus’ wrist and sagged against the nearest pie stand with a groan.

“Oh, for Christ’s sake,” she moaned. “I can’t believe I called him _beautiful_. And then told him to call me Mildly Suspicious? Kill me now.”

“Oh, who cares? He is beautiful. And he thought you were funny.”

“He didn’t even hear the joke! At least Sirius took pity on me, but my God. I practically threw myself at James, and he couldn’t have cared less. I’m a proper idiot.”

 “You’re so dramatic,” Remus said, rolling his eyes. “You didn’t throw yourself at him at all. Anyway, I’ll bet he's bad at reading signals. You know how straight boys can be.”

“There wasn’t much for him to read, my _signals_ couldn’t have been any more obvious if I’d danced topless on the peach stand! He’s just not interested.”

“Oh, stop it, it wasn’t that bad!” Remus said, chuckling. “And I saw the way he looked at you. He’s interested, he’s probably just out of practice flirting. He’s got a baby, after all. Who knows when he last went on a date.”

“And that’s another thing! He’s got a _child_ , a very small child! He could still be with the child’s mother, and here I go, flashing my knickers at him and asking if he wants a ride!”

“Lily!” Remus was doubled over with laughter now. “Your behavior was perfectly socially appropriate. You met a fit guy and you flirted a bit. So what he didn’t jump you in the middle of the market? I bet if we found him now and _you_ asked for his number, he’d give it to you.”

“I’d rather not come over any more desperate, thanks,” Lily grumbled. “Just leave it alone, already.”

“Aw, Lil.” With some difficulty, Remus stopped laughing and put his arm around her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I’m just not so convinced he wasn’t interested. Unless…” Remus trailed off and grimaced. “Ah, shite.”

“What?”

“I wonder if he’s gay. I mean, I didn’t think so, but he could be…”

“What?” Lily elbowed Remus in the ribs. “Are you really suggesting he's gay just because he didn't ask for my number? I mean, I know I’m an absolute goddess, but that’s a bit presumptuous, don’t you think?” She stuck out her tongue to show she was teasing, and Remus rolled his eyes.

“No, Big Head,” he said, giving her shoulders a squeeze. “I'm wondering if he's gay because he _was_ here with a _gorgeous_ guy _and_ he didn't ask for your number.”

The sound of raucous laughter from behind them interrupted Lily from objecting any further to Remus’ faulty reasoning. She spun around, forcing Remus to turn, too, and found herself face-to-face with James, Harry, and Sirius. Sirius was the one cackling. James was smiling uncomfortably. Harry was oblivious to it all, munching on a peach almost as big as his face.

“James _wishes_ he could pull a guy as fit as me,” Sirius declared through his laughter.

And, for the third time in the past quarter hour, Lily wanted to die.

\---

Now that they were here, James was not sure why he’d let Sirius convince him to chase after Lily. She looked absolutely mortified, and Sirius was laughing so loudly passerby were starting to notice.

“I’m _so_ sorry,” Lily said. “We were just—”

“Talking about us, yeah,” Sirius said, grinning. “That’s great, actually. ‘Cause James _isn’t_ gay, and he wants to talk to you, too.”

Remus’ eyes lit up. “Told you,” he murmured to Lily. She glared at him before quickly smiling at James.

“Oh. Well, okay,” she said cautiously.

James shot Sirius a glare, as well. He was glad his skin was dark enough to mostly hide his blush as he stepped towards Lily with a nervous smile.

“Er, right,” he said. “It’s just, er, well, Harry and I had an idea.”

Out of the corner of his eye, James saw Sirius smack himself in the forehead.

Lily raised her eyebrows. “Did you?”

“Erm, yes. We’d really like to see you again.”

“Really?” she asked, her pretty mouth twisting in a small smile. “Harry would like to see me again?”

Harry buried his peach-juice-covered face in his father’s shirt and shook his head, and James chuckled.

“Well no, not really.” He leaned towards Lily confidentially. “You’re terrifying, remember? But I was trying to be polite.”

Lily laughed, and James noticed that not only did the corners of her eyes crinkle when she did, but she scrunched up her nose, too. It was very cute.

“I think I should be insulted,” she said, putting a hand on her hip.

“Technically, you said it first,” James said with an easy smile. His nerves were receding with each word they spoke. “But that’s why we should get together sometime. How else will we get you a new nickname?”

Sirius groaned. "Come, Harry, you shouldn't have to listen to this," he said, taking the child from James' arms. He turned to Remus. "Harry and I are going to inspect these pies over here, if you care to join. I'm hoping with my influence, my godson won't grow up to be as corny as his father."

Remus' cheeks turned pink. “Sure, if you don't mind.” He glanced back at Lily as he walked away, a half-smile on his face.

Lily waved him off, then turned back to James with a half-smile of her own. “Your friend’s right, you know. You’re impressively corny.”

“You’re one to talk, Mildly Suspicious.”

“Oh, God, I didn’t think you’d heard that part,” Lily said, covering her face with both hands. She dropped her arms to her sides and met James’ eyes with a question. “So…you’re asking me out?”

“Depends.” James ran a hand through his hair, hoping the movement looked casual instead of like the nervous tic it was. “Are you more likely to agree if I admit it, or if I keep pretending it’s for Harry’s sake? I know he’s the real draw here.”

“I did say he’s beautiful,” Lily said, with another adorable giggle.

James laughed, too. “You said _I’m_ beautiful, actually.”

Lily shook her head and smiled. “If I go out with you, you’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“No. But, I’ll make it even: I think you’re beautiful, too.”

Lily rolled her eyes, but her cheeks flushed. “Thank you. You don’t have to say that.”

“I know I don’t, but it’s true.” James smiled again and shrugged sheepishly. “Look, it’s been a while since I’ve asked a woman out, so I’m probably mucking this all up. But I’d really like to get to know you better.”

“You’re not mucking it up. I thought _I’d_ mucked it up earlier, with my big mouth.”

“Not at all!” James said earnestly. “I think I quite like your mouth.”

Lily giggled and blushed, and James blushed with her. “Oh!” he said. “I didn’t, erm—I just meant—”

“It’s all right,” she assured him, grinning. “If anything, now we’re _really_ even.” She laughed some more and shook her head. “Aren’t we a pair?”

“Beautiful and Terrifying, both of us,” James agreed, smiling back. “But, you know what? I think the best things in life usually are.”

**Author's Note:**

> Y'ALLLL I started this as a one-shot, and it is a one-shot, but I really want to tell the rest of this story now??? So one day I will continue it, but I don't know when. In the meantime, I hope you like this part! If so, please leave me some love! xo


End file.
